whity whity whity

The guy lived in Santa Barbara of all places and couldn’t find a girl....
then he moved to Oxford and, instead, actually studied...
then Seattle and discovered that women there don’t shower...
then Sweden where he really stood out because everyone else was extremely beautiful...
and finally...he became a missionary’s boyfriend in Thailand and took a rickshaw ride all the way to Central Park.

That’s where he dropped to a knee and slid the rock on a Miss Paige's finger.

Now...Whity is homeless, jobless, broke, and engaged. For these reasons alone, we are extremely proud. The fact that it’s a top shelf gal he’s marrying, we are surprised. And because touching was forbidden in Thailand, Whity is getting married very soon.